‘Jack’ is paraded through the town before being ceremoniously slain to release the spirit of summer (yay!)

Festivities include Morris dancers, live music, lots of beer and a party atmosphere.

Well worth going if you are in the vicinity.

Refuse to talk about the weather.

Mildly disagree with them.

Jump a queue.

Keep saying ‘after you’  rather than going through the door that’s been opened.

Offer postive ideas and solutions to everything they moan about.

Ban the colours beige and magnolia.

Weep loudly in public.

Admit that you hate animals, especially dogs and cats.

Praise the current Government.

Act happy in a post office

We have it so rarely that everyone feels a tad excited about it, without wanting to admit it.

We quite like disrupted trafffic, being unable to get into work and schools closing and would not want to be so used to it that everything continued as normal.

It’s a great excuse to have a good moan about something we are actually enjoying and when it stops and the fallen snow turns to slush we wish it would last longer while telling each other ‘thank goodness we can get back to normal.’

I had a sudden craving for pie and mash today, as served in the best traditional pie and mash shops. It was probably because the weather was cold with blustery wind and rain. Unfortunately London is a bit far to go, despite the craving so I’ll have to wait until my next trip.

Pie and mash shops were (and in parts, still are) a real staple of South, and East London life.

In the 18th and 19th Centuries these areas were populated, mostly by the working classes. Food providers had to offer robust dishes at reasonable prices to persuade customers to buy their wares.

The eel, caught in the River Thames was a cheap food, and minced meat baked in a pie with a side dish of mashed potato was very cheap to produce. Parsley sauce, known as, added a richer flavour and juiciness to the slightly bland, dry pie and mash. As many shops bake their own pies and make their own mash, each has it’s own special flavour.

The combination of pie, mash and liquor was an absolute hit, hence it’s survival today.

Most pie and mash shops were or are family businesses. Goddard’s Pie Shop in Greenwich was founded in 1890 by Albert Goddard and run as a family business through the generations to 2006/7. I believe it has now closed. M Manzes is the longest standing pie and mash outlet and once had five shops. Three remaining Manze pie and mash outlets in London are run by family members.

Modern pie and mash shops still look traditional from the outside and many still retain the blue green décor, wooden seats and marble table tops. The basic one or two pies, mash and liquor menus have expanded to include gravy, a range of pies, including vegetarian or curried, and pudding pies such as apple or plum.

If you are in, or planning a trip to London see

http://www.londoneats.com/search/bestworst.asp?WhichFoodType=Pie+and+Mash

http://www.londoneats.com/search/dosearch.asp?Rest_FoodType=Pie%20and%20Mash

I’m not talking about large popular, specific or occasional ones like Camden (as was,) Riverside, Portobello, Aberystwyth, Totnes; or Farmers markets, but your local or regular Saturday market with random stalls full of plastic toys, uninspiring pictures, shiny clothes, pet food, plastic handbag racks, sad cheap cards and the odd meat van or product seller shouting ever decreasing prices for their wares.

The best seller is usually the fruit and veg stall, which, if you are lucky has good quality produce and lots of offers as the day wears on.

Families mooch around, many trailing dogs or pushing prams, but nobody seems cheerful or happy even on the sunniest of days.

Visitors to Britain expecting a vibrant, colourful market, full of exciting produce, sounds, smells and stalls with traditional preserves, home made breads, pasties and pies, good quality clothes and household goods, wooden toys, old fashioned sweets and pottery will be grimly dissapointed.

Why do we accept so much less than the best? Are we apathetic? Is it because we happily buy junk at inflated prices? Why are our markets laden with crap, and worse, why do we buy it?

Déjà vu on every aisle and every display. Wine sales, plates, signs were exactly duplicated, even to where they were placed. I could have been in either store. It may not be news to some of you, and I know stores are similar in layout, offers etc but never dreamed they tried to be as identical as possible.

How dreadful that someone in Scotland or Cornwall can enter a store and see exactly the same layout, products and prices as I do in Sussex. Thank goodness the staff are different,  although the uniforms keep them as anonymous as possible and  the store would clone them too if they could.

Tesco’s is obviously not the only one, but how awful that Britain with our individuality, quirks and eccentricities should have shops that have none.

Many grand gestures need an element of risk or foolhardiness to raise them from kind or nice to grand. Receiving a box of chocolates is always lovely but receive one from someone who has gone through various trials and tribulations to get them make the gesture a grand one. (old Milk Tray adverts.)

People climb bridges and hang messages displayed on sheets while others pay small aircraft to write smoke messages in the sky, but they are not always grand gestures because grand gestures also involve an element of impulse and large-heartedness!

My brother who lives in America and is far from wealthy decided to send his mother -in the UK, flowers for her birthday. He then thought it would also be nice to send some to me, and to his other sister, and the other one, and also his brother. The flower company were bemused as he kept phoning back with yet another request.

He was quite tipsy but when he had sobered up he laughed his head off at the thought of the bouquets he had sent out and when the company phoned to confirm the order (despite the huge bill) he told them to go ahead and send them.

The reality is that I had vegetables, frozen veg, cheese, pasta, potatoes, various tins, butter, milk, eggs and all the basics such as oil etc. I had plenty, yet wasted petrol and time to get more.

Obviously I had nothing in that I wanted or could be bothered to cook. I wonder how many trips, in households throughout the country/and other wealthy countries where this also applies. How spoilt we’ve all become, so fast.

A typical week’s ration for 1 person for a week in 1942 thus:-

Bacon and ham: 4oz (100g) Around one shilling and sixpence worth of meat:
Cheese: 2oz(50g) sometimes it went up to 4oz (100g.)
Margarine: 4oz (100g)
Butter: 2oz (50g)
Milk: 3 pints(1800ml) occasionally dropping to 2 pints (1200ml). 1 packet of dried ‘household’ milk per four weeks.
Sugar: 8oz (225g).
Jam: 1lb (450g) every two months.
Tea: 2oz (50g). (half a packet or the equivalent of 15 tea bags)
Eggs: 1 fresh egg a week if available but often only one every two weeks. 1 packet of dried eggs every four weeks.
Sweets: 12oz (350g) every four weeks.

No conclusion here, just the hope that I think twice before concluding that I have no food in the house,  and buying more.

Everyone will enjoy traditional Easter hymns and the story of Jesus rising from the tomb. Then they’ll go home to their huge roast and the meaning and the story will be forgotten.

But why do people turn up to church at Easter? If they are atheists, then why would they? If they are not sure then is it to lay some kind of claim on Christianity, just in case it all turns out to be true? If they do believe then are they too lazy to get up more than once or twice a year?

On the other hand, churches are heaving with those who go for the social interraction, to have a role to play, to make themselves feel good and other reasons which have nothing to do with believing the gospel message.

Still, Tesco is closed on Easter Day so maybe that explains the rise in church numbers.

Prepare ye also for the supermarket store where shelves will be stripped by those preparing for the four day seige, queues will stretch endlessly, and the last of the cheap Easter Eggs will be bought up by the person in front of you, leaving you with a choice of little cream eggs or the most expensive costing quadruple the amount you planned to spend.

Prepare ye also for an Easter meal of happy families, long walks, board games, boring television programmes, squabbles and too much chocolate.

Prepare ye to return to work, shattered.